The Graves
by Looking to the sky to save me
Summary: Harry does something he should have done along time ago.


**The Grave.**

He had to do this sometime. He knew it was going to be hard, he knew it was going to hurt. But Hermione was right; he was going to have to do it someday. He didn't know why he was so nervous; he shouldn't be scared of what happened.

Maybe it was the guilt, the guilt of knowing it was his fault, that prevented him from going. Hermione had been a few times and she always came back slightly depressed but happier in the long run.

"It's not your fault Harry, really its not," she kept telling him, but he knew she was lying. It was his fault, and that hung over him, over shadowed his victory, and made his life dark.

'Sure, Harry Potter can defeat the Dark Lord but cannot do one simple thing?' he thought, annoyed with himself for being so scared.

This morning Hermione had picked him up in her car. She just told him to get in, giving no explanation about where they were going. Harry got in, knowing it would be worse for him if he didn't comply.

They were driving down very quiet country roads, bordered with trees and bushes. It was quite pleasant for Harry, who just sat in the front seat watching the world pass him by, watching the rain on the windows. It was a light drizzle and it made interesting patterns on the windscreen as Hermione drove down the winding roads.

The car stopped suddenly and Hermione got out. Harry followed her, confused. They were in what looked like a huge field surrounded by trees of all shapes and sizes.

"Hermione, where are we?" he asked her, in confusion.

"Look around Harry…and you will understand." She told him with a sympathetic look on her face.

Harry looked around the field and caught sight of a little path, and next to it a sign.

"Godric's Hollow Graveyard" 

"Hermione…" Harry knew why he had been brought here and knew why Hermione didn't tell him where they were going, he would have refused to go if she had.

"Harry please, just take these." She handed him some flowers she had hidden in the back seat. "Please just go lay these down, you will feel better if you do. Please just for me…I'll wait for you here."

Despite being ashamed, guilty and nervous, Harry nodded. He walked up the path, flowers in hand. Before realizing that he didn't know where to go. He looked back to Hermione and she called "Go down to the bottom of the middle path, then it's the first one on left." He nodded. The quicker he got there the quicker he could leave. He walked down the path and stopped at the bottom.

He drew a sharp intake of air, preparing himself for the memories he knew were sure to flood his brain when he looked at this headstone. He stood looking at the gravestone reading the inscription.

Sirius Black 

_He will be sorely missed._

_1.7.1960 – 8.6.1996_

_R.I.P_

Harry cleared away the dead flowers and began to put a few in the stone vase on the gravestone. His gaze fell on the grave next to Sirius'.

"_Sophia Black_

_A great wife to Sirius Black and mother to Ella._

_24.6.1961-7.5.1979_

_R.I.P"_

It was Sirius' wife's grave and next to that was a small headstone, one of a child.

"Ella Black 

_A beautiful child taken before her time._

_18.12.1978- 7.5.1979_

_R.I.P"_

She wasn't even a year old, just 5 months old. Harry guessed she was killed in an attack with her mother, who seemed to have died on the same day. Harry wondered why he had never been told about this side of Sirius' family and guessed it pained his godfather to talk about it.

Harry cleared away the dead flowers from the two graves, and put a few of the fresh flowers there. Harry smiled; it looked like someone actually cared for these people now. They were not forgotten.

"Sirius, I know you probably can't hear me but, I, um, want to say sorry for what happened, I really am truly sorry. I am sorry I didn't come here sooner, I owed you that. You died because of one of my mistakes." Harry felt tears begin to form in his eyes and he blinked them away fiercely.

He dropped a flower he was putting in Ella's vase and it rolled over and landed on the next grave. Harry bent over to pick it up and he caught sight of the headstone.

"_James Potter_

_Great dad, fantastic husband and beloved friend._

_6.11.1959-31.10.1981_

_R.I.P"_

This was his Dad's grave? He had wondered where his parents were laid to rest, but he could never bring himself to ask. Now he knew. In his 5th year at Hogwarts he found out he had been the reason both his parents died, and in that same year his Godfathers died because of him. After that he kept away from Remus Lupin, a friend of his parents and of his godfather, because he felt so guilty.

He took one of the flowers out of Sirius' vase and put it in his Dad's after clearing away the moldy flowers.

He took a deep breath, if this was his Dad's then the one next to it must be –

"_Lily Potter_

_Beloved mother, brilliant wife and a true friend. _

_1.7.1960-31.101981_

_R.I.P"_

His mother's grave. He gathered all the dead flowers and then put some fresh ones there.

"Mum, Dad, I really am sorry. I-" It began to rain heavily and the rain mixed with the tears on Harry's face. Harry, overcome with emotion, bent down on his knees and sobbed.

The people lying in this row all died as a casualty of war. Sirius died because of him, as did his parents. Sophia and Ella died in Voldemort's attack but still Harry felt responsible for these deaths. Part of Voldemort was in Harry, part of his power, the same power that killed his parents. That power had inspired death eaters and gave to Bellatrix the power to kill her own cousin. That made part of Harry responsible for the deaths of thousands of innocent people.

Harry sat up, his eyes still wet with tears. He wiped his eyes with the back of his hand. He made sure that each of the graves had flowers and then stood up.

Harry whispered "I hope you can be proud of me." And left with the promise of coming back next month.

Please comment, tell me if you liked it. It makes me happy that people read my stories.


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